Nerve wracking weekend.
Spent most of it so far working out in my head what to do about my dad. He’s getting to the point where I’m not comfortable with him driving. Worried he’s going to hurt himself or others in an accident, so I’m trying to figure out out to broach the subject. It’s very complicated, questions of independence, ability, and judgment.
I’m angry too. Not at him, but at the situation. One year almost from my mom’s death, now this moment where the options are limited. They don’t tell you this when you are young, everyone says “life’s not fair” and that it’s going to be hard, but no one bothers to mention that even if you do the right thing and give a damn about your life and the people in it you may still be faced with equally terrible decisions.
He’s starting to say things that don’t quite make sense, I can see him working to put things together but I’m not sure they fit. I know, of course, about dementia and all the other sorts of things that can happen. I’ve worked so hard to be supportive, yet there’s so little I can do. You’re just managing the shitshow, my friend Mark used to say.
Sounds about right.